This requires proper examination of self. What makes me stagnant and forget to be what I am meant to be in life? Is it that I have not made enough effort to know who I am? Is my foundation baseless? What happened to my education? Do I have phobia to confront the world around me? Do I have a scar that reminds me of my past? Is it my life style? How we live our lives reflects who we are. We cannot live without being futuristic. Our life today can affect our tomorrow if not properly planned. With the rise of social media we have to be careful of instant messages that are destructive to human values. Even though we have been bombarded with much information today but we must know what to pick and what to reject. We must not respond with fear but with critical mind. We are today suffering from aftermath of the destructive messages from the social media, messages that are not vetted before the youth disgorged them. Moreover, the internet has got hold of many of our youth.
Everybody lives for better things to come but there can be a disconnect when we live outside the main stream of our society and live one kind of life that does not inspire others. Many lifestyles are displayed on the internet of today. Internet has become vendors of false values of styles and many of our youth are victims of uncensored information and values displayed by media prophets. Many of our people especially the youth have developed many lifestyles that do not really inspire people. People today sell their cheap way of living on the internet and the youth are buying them. What we get from the internet sometimes make us develop bizarre personality even from school too. We saw the lifestyle of Michael Jackson, people loved his music but he had to take drugs to keep his I.Q high to “feel” good. Excesses caused a personality problem. Some people developed style of drinking and when they are spiritually empty they look for something to fuel the emptiness.
Some are so selfwilled that they cannot change their mind on anything. They feel that flexibility is for the weak. Because of the lifestyle they have developed, they like to be on their own and you dare not cross their boundaries or ask them any question that will affect their deflated ego. They live in their own little world always looking at the magnifying glasses to see the intruder that is coming to invade their space. They suffer from insecurity. They are an island of their own. They exaggerate themselves to a fault. Really, they are not happy people. They are not committed; once they say something they withdraw from what they have said. Their mood fluctuates all the time. Being angry and hurting people is their game of survival.
They are very cynical and vulgar. If you don’t calculate very well and come when they are in a depressing mood, you regret the day you were born. Such people who develop such lifestyle are always a butt of ridicule. They do not have any feeling of shame. Sensible people do not drag themselves to their level for fear that they might be finished by their vulgarity. They are very egoistic and have a sense of possessiveness. They love materialism and if they have a lot and their happiness is short lived; nothing ever satisfies them. A person like that may have suffered from psychological disorder by withdrawing from people when you are about to know him. Such a person has suffered hurt been misunderstood and because of that he developed a thick skin and would not like to be what he was meant to be. Hard condition of life can make a person to start life again. How can one stop growing while he has not achieved anything in life? What type of circumstances can make a person not to be what God wants him to be in life? A person like that needs to go to a psychological clinic where he can be helped.
We have met many people like that who have wasted their lives without making a mark in life. If such a person is not detected in time he can be a great enemy to the environment and people. Such a person has become numb to issues about himself. We have to be careful to live in the society and the social media. We have to be careful of whom we meet and associate with. We have to know also that the hangups of our childhood also contribute to the way we are if the family scripts are not followed properly. There is a price we pay if we fail to be what we are meant to be.
• Very Rev. Msgr Livinus Ukah is an Author of many books and a Social, Justice and Peace Advocate.