…Like Father like father
By Fr. ‘Shola Alabi, OSJ
Introduction
There is the common saying that goes thus: “like father like son”. When said, they speak to the son by making reference to the father in terms of a likelihood, of similar traits of appearance either physical or, in most cases, in action. This common saying do not put them at par nor project the father and son to be the same persons. In the same attitude, we are looking at Saint Joseph, thus, seeing God the Father. We won’t be mincing words when we say, Joseph is like his Father – like Father like father. Saint Joseph is a father, who has taken after his Father in action. When we look at Saint Joseph, we can actually see God the Father – Joseph is the shadow of the Father. With this in mind, this piece presents to us Saint Joseph as the shadow of the Father and, at the same time, a model to all fathers in all facets of life, who we can say is a carbon copy of the Father from whom all fatherhood comes. We may want to ask, is he, who is human like us, could be said to be like the Father? Be that as it is, by imitating him, we are assured that we are on the right path.
Therefore, this article will show in what ways Saint Joseph could be a model to fathers in all aspects of life. This shall be enunciated by looking at, first, the likelihood of the Father and the father, that is, God and Saint Joseph. Having noted the ‘shadow’, this piece will further discuss, under different blocks of fathers in the family, in the church and in the society, how Saint Joseph sheds his light on our fathers. This expose does not pretend to be exhaustive as it gives room for further discussions. When we say “like Father like father”, the denominator “father” directs our minds to the identity and quality of who a father is and what we can see in both persons. But taking a leap from what father means, we understand that, first and foremost, a father is one who begets an offspring, a life in biological terms. This is readily seen in ancient languages and cultures.
For example, the Latin “Pater”, which translates as father, is understood as a genitor, that is, one who brings into being. Even in our local languages, for example, in Hausa, mahaifii means father, derived from the verb stem “haif” which means to procreate, beget, that is, father is one who gives birth. Likewise, one can become a father through adoption as we understand it in the second meaning of the French “Pere” (father). So also, one could become a father by marrying or becoming a partner to someone with child(ren). Yes, the understanding of fatherhood has developed greatly, not to be restricted to just one who begets biologically, by adoption or by association but to add, a father is the one who takes care. In fact, in human relations and reality, the “care” seems to confer on a person a (worthy, true and responsible) father than the “beget”. In similar remark, Pope Francis in his Apostolic Letter, Patris Corde, will put it that “A man does not become a father simply by bringing a child into the world, but by taking up the responsibility to CARE for that child.
Whenever a man accepts responsibility for the life of another, in some way he becomes a father to that person.” The Church teaches that among the essential properties of marriage is openness to fertility (to father a child and does not stop there) and to educate the child(ren), that is, to serve life, to care. St Pope John Paul II explains this further that “the fruitfulness of conjugal love is not restricted solely to the procreation of children, even understood in its specifically human dimension: it is enlarged and enriched by all those fruits of moral, spiritual and supernatural life, which the father and mother are called to hand on to their children.” (Familiaris Consortio 28; CCC 1653) So, there is more to just begetting biologically, responsibility defines fatherhood. Truly, responsibility defines fatherhood! We have seen cases where a man will deny of being responsible for impregnating a woman. Then, it takes the doggedness of the woman to save the baby or the life is lost. Responsibility begins from the very start of life and continues to be at the service of that life when the child is born and beyond.
This speaks more about who a father is, to protect and provide for the family. When we look again at the etymological definition of father, we would see this playing out. For examples, in Hebrew, “ab” (father) would mean strength of the house, that is, one who protects and watches over his household; in Greek, “Pater” from the root word “pa” would mean nourisher, protector, upholder. Even in some of our local languages, we get this depictions like in Yoruba’s Baale – Baa-ile, head of the house, one who oversees, protects, covers the household; in Igbo’s Nna-anyi, our head, strength, that is, one in whom we render our security.
The father protects his children (and family) and equally provides what are needed, nourishes them in their holistic development and fulfilment – human, moral, spiritual and intellectual. From the foregoing therefore, when we speak of father, we fundamentally noting 3 PROs – Procreate (as he begets not just biologically), Protect (as he is at service of that life) and Provides (as he continues to nourish the life). We have a model, who is a shining example to all fathers – Saint Joseph. He is a true father, who teaches every man and persons the right attitude of fatherhood. We must not still forget that we have one Father, from whom all fatherhood comes – God. Be that as it may, we will not be mincing words to say that Saint Joseph has given us a true picture of the Fatherhood of God, whom we can confidently call the shadow of the Father. You may want to ask, how? Come with me and let us have a walk through.
• Rev. Fr. ‘Shola Alabi OSJ is an Oblate of St. Joseph based in Ibadan
