Don’t allow crave for power to divide us, cleric to Nigerians as LSM holds seminar

Rev. Fr. Augustine Anagboso, Priest in Residence, St. Leo Catholic Church has charged Nigerians not to allow crave for power by politicians to divide them across ethnic and party lines. Delivering the homily at the Holy Mass preceding the 5th Education Seminar by Ladies of St. Mulumba (LSM), Lagos Metropolitan Council at St. Leo Catholic Church, Ikeja, Lagos on Saturday, March 25, 2023, Fr. Anagboso said Christians are called by God to be in unity within themselves and in unity with all followers of Jesus. He said, “When the society in which we live in wants to divide us, when the crave for power by politicians wants to divide us, we should have in mind that in Christ, we are one humanity, we are one family with God and should shun ethnic hatred and political divide. “We don’t have the Eucharist of the North; we don’t have the Eucharist for the South; neither do we have the faith of the Igbo nor the faith of the Hausa, nor faith of the Yoruba. It’s one faith in God, one faith in Christ, we must always uphold this faith. “We must always uphold this faith we possess, especially within the order of the knighthood where we are called to defend the faith. Let us therefore uphold our faith that leads to mutual edification. “Our faith should keep us united with the ultimate goal of promoting peacefulness of living unified in harmony.”

The cleric enjoined Nigerians particularly Christians to refrain from the politics of division that puts one ethnic group against the other. He added, “Muslim-Muslim ticket, well I don’t know what it would have been. It is beclouded by partisanship. Their allegiance is more to their party than their faith. Christians stand up for your faith. When something is going against your faith, raise your voice. When something is going against the Moslem, they will confront it. “Look at what has happened to Egypt, Algeria, Islam is creeping into other parts of the world. They will keep establishing Sharia to promote their faith”. Fr. Anagboso advised, “If you are participating in politics, promote the common good of the people and uphold, as well as defend your Christian faith.” On a final note he prayed, “May we cherish this faith of ours; may we promote it by our words, deeds; it doesn’t come easy, it was not easy with Mother Mary.” Almost 350 delegates from 29 Sub-Councils of the Ladies of St. Mulumba, Nigeria, Lagos Metropolitan Council attended the 2023 edition of their annual Education Seminar. In her Welcome Remarks, Lady Juliet Osuigwe, President, LSM, Lagos Metropolitan Council, noted that annually, the Seminar sets strategic objectives and actions for the advancement of women, especially in critical areas of concern that bother on education, health and marriage considering their vital roles in the family and socio-economic development of the society. She said, “Women are the key to sustainable development and quality of life in the family. No knowledge is lost, knowledge is information, knowledge is awareness, knowledge is power, and so the LSM, Lagos metro has made it an annual event to sensitise its members on these vital issues of life.

This seminar will feature three papers tagged, ‘Marriage vocation-a relationship that last forever’; ‘Cancer: Early Detection is key’ and ‘Discipline-the Bedrock of the Order by three great women. “Women represent the cornerstone of a family’s overall health, ensuring that they have access to quality care can also lead to improved health for children and families. The health of families and the society are no doubt, tied to the health of women. More so, marriage and family are the key structures in most societies. Good marriages are the bedrock of strong societies, for they are the foundations of strong families, hence LSM is committed to strengthening marriages and families.” Feedback from the delegates indicated that the respective papers were inspiring and the speakers scored very highly individually. The first speaker, Dr. Uzoamaka Nwigbo, a medical doctor, stressed that prevention and early detection are key to tackling Cancer. According to her, Cancer is the second leading cause of death globally, accounting for an estimated 9.6 million deaths, or one in six deaths, in 2018. Dr. Nwigbo said, “Lung, prostate, colorectal, stomach and liver cancer are the most common types of cancer in men, while breast, colorectal, lung, cervical and thyroid cancer are the most common among women. Globally, survival rates of many types of cancers are improving thanks to accessible early detection, quality treatment and survivorship care.” She noted that in Nigeria, high mortality from cancer persists, owing to inadequate population awareness, poor health seeking behaviour, low levels of female education, and empowerment in addition to a poor health system, leading to suboptimal treatment services. Dr. Nwigbo listed alcohol, tobacco, overweight/obesity, physical inactivity, dietary factors, family history of cancer and previous history of cancer as some critical risk factors of cancer. Others include infections, hormone therapy, radiation, environmental pollution and occupational carcinogens.

“Non-specific symptoms related to the body part affected by cancer include cough, chest pain and breathlessness (cough of 3 weeks or more), changes in bowel habits, bloating, bleeding, lumps moles, unexplained weight loss, tummy or back pain, indigestion and heartburn, itchy or yellow skin, feeling tired and unwell,” she said. Speaking on Breast Cancer, the medical doctor noted that it is important to follow recommendations for screening test which often includes, Mammography, every 1-2 years for women aged 40 – 50 years; every 2 years for women aged 50 -71 years; high risk – from 30 years, yearly; Breast MRI scan – high risk- thirties, yearly. According to her other supportive tests are Self breast examination every 3 to 5 days after the period every month; Clinical breast examination – yearly and Breast ultrasound scan for women aged less than 40 years. For Cervical cancer, she recommended screening tests like PAP Smear, every 3 years for 21 – 65 years; HPV DNA Test plus pap smear, every 5 years from 30 years; and above 65 years – No routine screening. She listed Colposcopy, Biopsy, Pelvic examination under anaesthesia, CT Scan, MRI Scan, PET-CT Scan and Genetic Studies as various means of determining if one has Cervical Cancer. Highlighting the four types of treatment for Cancer which includes Surgery, Chemotherapy (powerful cancer-killing medicines), Radiotherapy (the controlled use of high-energy X-rays), Immunotherapy and Hormonal therapy, the physician noted that prevention offers the most cost-effective long-term strategy for the control of cancer. She added, “Between 30% and 50% of cancer deaths could be prevented by modifying or avoiding key risk factors and implementing existing evidence-based prevention strategies.”

Dr. Celine Njoku, a Counselling Psychologist, speaking on the second paper titled, “Vocation of Marriage Institution: -Relationship That Lasts Forever,” said the Catholic Church teaches that marriage is a Christian vocation, in which the couple’s relationship is more than simply their choice to enter a union which is a social and legal institution. She further explained, “In addition to these things, marriage involves a call from God and response from two people who promised to build, with the help of divine grace, a lifelong, intimate and sacramental partnership of love and life. “Wedding is an event, not marriage. Marriage is rather a life-long affair! You get done with the wedding in a matter of 24-hours, but what happens after that one-day event is what we call marriage. “Marriage is called an institution because from it you learn – you learn to let go of your ego for the sake of your relationship, you learn to be loving, caring and affectionate, you learn to be a family man/woman, you learn to raise kids, you make mistakes, you learn from them. You learn to let rules and structures be adhered to. You marry their habits, their behaviour, and their weaknesses. “The institution of marriage is an institution of God. He performed the first marriage. So marriage is good and can be, should be, a great blessing. God ordained it for the good of men, women and children. True happiness is to be found in obedience to God’s will and Word. The marriage relationship is a loving bond which should grow strong as years pass.”

She listed the basic rights in a relationship:

• The right to emotional support • The right to be heard by the other and to respond

• The right to have your own point of view, even if this differs from your own partner’s

• The right to live free from accusation and blame • The right to live free from criticism and judgement

• The right to live free from emotional and physical threat.

• The right to live free from angry outbursts and rage.

• The right to be respectfully asked, rather than ordered Dr. Celine further stated that healthy relationships involve honesty, trust, respect and open communication between partners and the effort and compromise from both people. She said there is no imbalance of power, and it has features also described as characteristics of healthy relationships which are:

• Respect for privacy and space, you don’t have to be with your partner 24/7

• Encourages you to participate in activities with friends.

• Freedom to express opinion and concerns to your partner • Feel physically safe in relation to consent to sexual pleasure

• Your partner respects your wishes and feelings when there are disagreements or conflicts.

While stressing that no two marriages are the same, the Counselling Psychologist opined that human interaction shows that all happy, long-lasting marriages share the same five basic traits: communication, commitment, kindness, acceptance and love. Dr. Njoku elaborated on each of the traits:

“Communication: Couples with long-lasting marriages believe in open communication and good communication, these help them maintain closeness and intimacy to each other without lying, accusing, blaming, dismissing, insulting and what is important to these couples is that the relationship is healthy.

“Commitment: A sense of commitment is a key factor in long -lasting marriages, a glue that holds your marriage together. Healthy couples take their marriage vows seriously and commit to each other without any conditions, no judgments, guilt trips, or threats of divorce rather we should see marriage worthy to sacrifice for something more rewarding later on.

Kindness: To maintain a healthy good marriage relationship, the old adage is true: “A little kindness goes a long way”. The key factors affecting the length of marriage relationship are kindness and generosity.

 Acceptance: The couples in healthy marriage relationship know that “no one is perfect” yet they accept their own faults as well as those of their partner despite your perceived shortcomings, and he or she deserves the same unconditional acceptance from you.

Love: A loving couple is a happy couple. Healthy mature love is something that needs time in order to develop, along with the traits listed above: communicate, honesty, kindness, acceptance, resolve conflicts easily and continue to keep their relationship intimate and alive. She noted that at times, marriage relationship may go soar, unhappy, unhealthy, which is absolutely possible, as she also stressed that divorce is not the answer nor anger. She implored the Ladies to simply learn how to improve communication, bring back intimacy, and create a foundation that lasts. Most importantly however, they need to learn to wear the cloak of:

• Resolve conflicts

• Be a team

• Feel closer

• Understand each other

• Feel heard and listen better

• Build tradition- (emotional safety net)

Lady Adaku Mbama, Chairperson, International Federation of Women Lawyers (FIDA), Badagry branch, spoke on the last paper titled, “Discipline the bedrock of our Order.” She called on the ladies to train themselves for godliness through Discipline Lady Mbama said, “A Lady of St. Mulumba should train herself for godliness, through Discipline. Discipline seems like a hard word, but discipline is your lifeline, something that you learn to embrace and thank God for as you grow in him. “The Apostle St. Paul links the idea of discipline with spiritual life “Train yourself for godliness” referring to a spiritual workout for “godliness is of value in every way, as it holds promise for the present life and also for the life to come” (1 Timothy 4: 7-8) says “But keep away from those godless legends which are not worth telling. Keep yourself in training for godly life” She took the Ladies through the essence of discipline as it applies to our Sacred Scripture in four steps tagged, Discipline of the Gospel, Discipline of Submission, Discipline of Prayer, Discipline of worship through Holy Mass and Discipline of Mind. Her thought-provoking paper took the ladies on self-examination and appraisal exercise on observation of the behavioural guidelines of the LSM. Lady Mbama noted that discipline is all encompassing for Ladies of St. Mulumba and as such they should strive to obey all rules and regulations of the order. She said on a final note, “It is in the best interest that we uphold our revered traditions of the order. This is our heritage, this we shall pass on to generations unborn. Discipline is the bedrock of our honoured order.